Rabbit Jokes
For jokes about rabbits, get ready to chuckle ...
A bumble bee was chasing a rabbit. Finally the bee turned around and flew away. Why? The rabbit had two b's already.
A lady opened her refrigerator and saw a rabbit sitting on one of the shelves, "What are you doing in there?" she asked. The rabbit replied, "This is a Westinghouse, isn't it?" The lady confirmed, "Yes." "Well," the rabbit said, I'm westing."
Baby Rabbit: Mommy, where did I come from? Mother Rabbit: I'll tell you when you're older. Baby Rabbit: Oh, Mommy, please, tell me now. Mother Rabbit: If you must know, you were pulled from a magician's hat.
Did you hear about the egg laden rabbit who jumps off bridges? He's the Easter Bungee!
Did you hear about the pub owner who raised a baby rabbit? It was an inn-grown hare!
Did you hear about the rabbit who got a job in a watch factory? Alike did was stand around making faces.
Did you hear about the rich rabbit? He was a millionhare!
Did you hear the Energizer Bunny Was Arrested? R. Charged With Battery!
How can you tell which rabbits are the oldest in a group? Look for grey hares.
How did the close race between the rabbit and the tortoise end? It was won by a hare!
How did the rabbit become a wrestling champion? It had a lot of hare pins!
How do rabbits get to work? By rabbit transit!
How do you know when there's a rabbit in your bed? You can smell the carrots on his breath.
How do you know when you're eating rabbit stew? When it has hares in it.
How do you make a rabbit fast? Don't feed it.
How do you make a rabbit stew? Keep it waiting.
How far can a rabbit run into the woods? Halfway. After that she's running out of the woods.
How is a rabbit like a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.
Lara Rabbit: Do you think that's Sophie's natural colour? Zara Rabbit: Only her hare dresser knows for sure.
May I buy half a rabbit? No, we don't split hares!
My friend is nuts. He thinks he's Bugs Bunny. But I'm positive he isn't. How do you know he isn't? Because I am.
Rabbit: Are you sure this bottle of special carrot juice will cure me? Doctor: Absolutely. No rabbit ever came back for another.
Rabbit: I got kicked out of my cage for not paying the rent. My wife walked out and took our twenty-nine bunnies with her. I'm all out of carrots. What should I do? Friend: Don't worry; be hoppy!
Two Rabbits are running from a group of foxes. They hide in a pile of hay, one rabbit says to the other one "ok we can run for it or we can stay here and out number them. And the other rabbit says, "were going to run for it you idiot I'm your brother.
Waiter, what is this hare doing in my salad? I believe he's eating your lettuce.
What are four hundred rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare line.
What book did the rabbit take on vacation? One with a hoppy ending.
What did the bunny say when he only had thistles to eat? Thistle have to do!
What did the bunny want to do when he grew up? Join the Hare Force.
What did the customer say to the pet shop assistant after buying a bunny? Rabbit up nicely, it's a gift!
What did the magician say when he made his rabbit disappear? Hare today, gone tomorrow.
What did the naughty rabbit leave for Easter? Deviled eggs!
What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring.
What do rabbits put in their computers? Hoppy disks!
What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long? A runny bunny.
What do you call a dumb bunny? A hare brain.
What do you call a man with a rabbit up his jumper? Warren!
What do you call a mobile homes for rabbits? Wheelburrows!
What do you call a rabbit that plays with foxes? A dumb bunny.
What do you call a rabbit who is real cool? A hip hopper.
What do you call a rabbit who tells jokes? A funny bunny
What do you call a rabbit who works in a bakery? A yeaster bunny!
What do you call a rabbit with fleas? Bugs Bunny.
What do you call a rabbit with no clothes on? A bare hare.
What do you call an affectionate rabbit? A tender, loving hare.
What do you call an easy-going rabbit? Hoppy-go-lucky.
What do you call an operation on a rabbit? A hare-cut.
What do you call an ugly rabbit that sits on someone's forehead? Unsightly facial hare!
What do you call an unusual rabbit? A rare hare.
What do you call it when one rabbit challenges another rabbit to hop across a forty-yard canyon? A hare dare.
What do you call the everyday routines of rabbits? Rabbits habits.
What do you get if you pour boiling water down rabbit holes? Hot, cross bunnies!
What do you get when you cross a bumble bee with a rabbit? A honey bunny.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with a leek? A bunion.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with a spider? A harenet.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with an orange? A pip squeak.
What do you get when you cross a frog and a rabbit? A rabbit that says, "Ribbit."
What do you get when you cross a perm with a rabbit? Curly hare.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a boy scout? A boyscout who helps little old ladies hop across the street.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a millionaire? A bunny with money.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with an elephant? An elephant who never forgets to eat his carrots.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with strawberry soda? A berry bubbly bunny.
What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole? A Hot Cross bunny.
What does a bunny use when it goes fishing? A harenet.
What is the difference between a crazy bunny and a counterfeit banknote? One is bad money and the other is a mad bunny!
What job do rabbits at hotels have? Bellhop.
What kind of cars do rabbits drive? Hop rods.
What must a policeman have before searching a rabbits' home? A search warren!
What should a rabbit use to keep his fur neat? A harebrush.
What weighs 35 tons, has four fuzzy ears and is 80 million years old? Two rabbits riding a brontosaurus.
What's a rabbits' favourite book? Hop on Pop.
What's a rabbits' favourite dance? The bunny hop.
What's a rabbits' favourite movie? Rabbits of the Lost Ark.
What's a rabbits' favourite musical? Hare.
What's a rabbits' favourite song? "Hoppy Birthday to You."
What's a rabbits' favourite TV show? Hoppy Days.
What's a rabbits' favourite car? Any make, just as long it's a hutchback!
What's the best way to catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on him
What's the fastest way to send a rabbit? Haremail.
When do rabbits have buck teeth? When their parents won't get them braces.
When does a rabbit go exactly as fast as a train? When it's on the train.
Where do rabbits go after their wedding? On their bunnymoon.
Where do rabbits settle their legal disputes? In a pellet court!
Which rabbit is a famous comedian? Bob Hop.
Which rabbit stole from the rich to give to the poor? Rabbit Hood.
Which rabbit was a famous female aviator? Amelia Harehart.
Which rabbit was in Western movies? Hopalong Cassidy.
Which rabbits were famous bank robbers? Bunny and Clyde.
Why are rabbits like calculators? They both multiply a lot.
Why are rabbits never gold? How would you tell them apart from goldfish?
Why couldn't the rabbit fly home for Easter? He didn't have the hare fare.
Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head? Because from a distance they looked like hares!
Why did the rabbit have trouble hopping? Because he always kept one foot in his pocket for good luck!
Why did the rabbit run out of the fast-food restaurant? He thought he heard someone order a quarter pounder on a toasted bunny.
Why did the rabbits go on strike? They wanted a better celery!
Why do rabbits go to the beauty parlour? For hare care.
Why is a bunny the luckiest animal in the world? It has 4 rabbits' feet.
